Possums Can Have Up To 50 teeth and 17 Nipples.

Ben's 5 Greatest Moments In Pansy Emo Kid Punk Rock Music Jams:

5. The little "woo!" in the breakdown from Brand New's "Logan to Government". A convenient little pause for you to either toss the Fender Strat over your shoulder, hitch up your skin tight girl jeans, or cry a little bit because your girlfriend sounded a little distant on the phone last night. Life is pain.

4. The intro to "Carousel" by Blink 182. I hear this intro, my testosterone surges, I punch the nearest kitten.

3. "The truth is you could slit my throat, and with my one last gasping breath I'd apologize for bleeding on your shirt." From Taking Back Sunday's "You're So Last Summer". I don't even like the song. And if a girl slit my throat, I'd probably just gurgle a little bit as she took her purse back. Then I'd go towards the light. But the line defines the genre, and kids who toss the hair out of their eyes everywhere quote this in their IM profiles. I felt obligated.

2. The entire Say Anything song "Admit It!". This man is angry. This man has a mental illness. This man was probably off his medication when he wrote this song. Hats off to you, Max Bemis. If the straight jacket fits, wear it. Such an angry song. It's like Alanis Morisette's "You Ought to Know"... if Alanis got all hopped up on testosterone, suffered from 'roid rage, and didn't even try to sing... just ranted into a microphone until the producer got pissed, ripped off his headphones, and went outside to smoke a cigarette. "How did I go from the Jonas Brothers album to this?", the producer says.

1. That one time I watched a kid crowd surf right off the edge of the pit and fall onto a metal railing at Warped Tour. Classic.



Today's Confession:
I watched "Dirty Dancing" almost daily until I was 6 years old. Parental screening of the children's media consumption? For hippies and liberals. Don't tell my 6 year old what he can and can't watch. This is America.

I Dig:
The fact that Obama ate a hot dog and went bowling in Altoona. Wow. I half expected him to unzip his pants after a large breakfast and drink some Natty Ice before driving the kids to school in the morning. "Look at me! I can relate to the middle class!", Obama says.

... dangit Barack. I wish I could quit you.

Hip Hop Gangster Shout Out To:
Matt Ford. You're from Texas. You're a fireman. You cook a mean flank steak. You're the man my dad wishes I could be.