here's some stuff i want to know:
- would It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia be better off without danny devito? does anyone else think he was added to the cast because they could have him, not necessarily because they should have him? i don't think he necessarily detracts from the brilliance of the show, but i feel as though his contribution to the show is superfluous. is less more in this instance?
- what moves you? i'm sure we can all come up with the obligatory and cliche answers, but what is it about our existence that compels you to look forward to another day?
- let's say you die and ascend into heaven. it turns out that heaven is, in fact, accurately depicted by the cheesy pastel christian artwork and kindergarten folklore that we're all familiar with. people are actually playing harps, wearing comfortable white bathrobes, walking amongst white clouds, and wearing identical content/blank smiles. you are welcomed by Peter and he gives you a choice. you can remain here in heaven or you are given the option to relocate yourself to "the other place" which Peter assures you is not hell... simply an alternative to heaven. he cannot give you the details about the other place, but he does tell you that 20% of people who are admitted into heaven choose the alternative. he gives you 15 minutes to choose. which option do you pick?
- reflexively, how does your mind react when someone mentions rob bell? positively or negatively? why? and has your opinion of him ever changed? why?
- when you go golfing, do you buy tees or just use the longest broken ones you can find on the tee blocks?
- think nickelback sucks? me too.
- in your mind, which judd apatow movie is the best? was your decision based on the level of humor, the quality of the film-making, your ability to relate to the characters or situations, or some other element?
- you are forced at gunpoint to listen to one band and one band only for the rest of your life. from here on out, the only music you will ever hear will be played by this band. furthermore, you must pick one of these three bands: green day, alice in chains, or staind. first of all, welcome to hell. second, which did you pick and why?
- think about the greatest thing that you ever done in your life. now, think about the worst thing that you have ever done in your life. think about what motivated you to do the former. think about what motivated you to do the latter. how similar are those motives? what made the difference?
- listen to npr on a regular basis? what possessed you to start? were you excited about the content or just sick of the garbage on the rest of the fm?
- when was the last time you hugged a stranger? someone you knew, but not that well? someone that wasn't a close friend or family member? did you throw in a little sniff just to make things awkward?
confession:
i stole 2 of these from the book chuck klosterman IV. i highly recommend it.
confession:
i really liked the legend of bagger vance.
hip hop gangster shoutout to:
dan kalbach. since soft bombing is doing so well, has my painting of the robots with horse hearts increased in value?
5 comments:
No, I did them all, Poop's funny.
1. i have had this conversation between others here in west chester. some beleive exactly what youve stated. devito is there simply because he was available. i however take the stance that he adds another element to the show. the old dude still trying to hang with a young crowd. ever see the invincible episode where he takes acid and stands in a trashcan for hours? also the simple fact he always has a gun is hilarious....poop is funny.
2. pursuit of sometime more. finding a way to better my life. finding another band. finding a new book. finding something that drives me. although sometimes its nothing. i havent been driven lately. a new day comes because 24 hours have passed. finding a better way to spend 24 hours...that compels me.
3. not an issue. ive got a 1-way ticket already to "the other place"
4. i just think of a bouncing ball. not negatively or positively. just a ball. bouncing.
5. broken tee's til im 30. bought tee's after.
6. yeah, certainly do
7. knocked up. close call with forgetting sarah marshall...but that british dude is a total tool, hilarious in the movie but a deushe in life...but really i only base any judd apatow movie on level of humor. i go into it to laugh, not to identify with the characters. i think i laughed the most during that one.
8. i choose suicide
9. interesting question. needs more thought
10. usually just cd's. no radio.
11. stranger - possibly never, probably a year ago. knew but not so well - friday but that was rare. im not a hugger. i usually sport the high five to strangers. sometimes high ten.
Fat chance Slim.
1. I don't really enjoy the program. But I'm guessing DeVito serves some purpose, as I don't think too many execs are calling him up begging him to be on their show. Unless a 'Twins II' is in the works...
2. This answer changes every day.
3. I'd go to that Heaven, just like I'd go to a Celine Dion concert. But you better believe I'm smugging in a flask.
4. I think Rob has great ideas. I think Rob makes one helluva bonfire. I don't like how us progressive Christians have made him into a celebrity. Let's just say he wouldn't be the first on my wish-list to have a beer with. I can see it now.
"MAY YOU finish that last bit of lager. MAY YOU avoid pissing in an alleyway. And MAY you drive home safely." End scene.
5. I always seem to have tees. Don't know how. Just always seem to have em. But on any par three, I rock the broken tee.
6. (Insert gong sound) Show's over, Chad.
7. I'm going to concur with my good friend Todd and say 'Knocked Up' with none of the others really coming close. I attribute this landslide victory to the presence of the ever-charming Paul Rudd.
8. Green Day. I still consider 'Dookie' one of the greatest albums of the '90's. I can't say that about any of the others. Don't get me wrong, they suck now but hey, better to be great at one point than shitty always.
9. I thought about others. I only thought about myself.
10. I don't listen to NPR, or any radio, much. But what I have heard, I like. Good concert series'.
11. At the predominantly black Baptist church I've been going to for a month now. It's a hugfest.
Haha, I obtained your URL from you sister! This is unfortunate for you my inquisitive friend!
-First of all it is a fact, documented someplace I'm sure, everything is better without Danny Devito. Danny Devito is only a positive addition to Bat Mitzvahs and drive by pepper spray attacks. He is also a requirement when trying to take a Schwarzenegger film from simply unbearable atrocity to homicide inducing tragedy.
-The thing that moves me and yet certain has not at least during the majority of my life compelled me toward additional days is simple.
Lack of another option. At least for the time being. I continue to maintain hope that one day I will be present to witness the fall of modern Rome. At this time I shall return to the ways of my Pagan ancestors with fervor. Marauding, looting, plundering, ravaging, and terrorizing small coastal villages who shall once again know the fear of the Northmen who arrive by sea on the backs of dragons! That is what I look forward to.
-As for the heaven thing, I'll bite for the sake of argument. First of all I'm going to laugh and make a snide remark about his name being Peter. Next, since I'm already there then technically I should be exempt from further punishment (should I not?) and therefore I would like to know if I can shank him and just take his activities list for place number 2. Then I can make an informed decision. If I can't I'll choose place number 2 anyhow because anything has to be better than rocking out to harp music and hanging out with Mormons for eternity!
-I've honestly never heard of anybody by the name of Rob Bell until I read this and looked him up. I reviewed his photograph oh so very briefly... I have concluded that he and I cannot be friends. He appears douchetastic and this caused feelings of ire to arise.
-When I go golfing it doesn't matter whether I use the long broken or brand new tees because my ball will land in the same spot in the forest regardless.
-I am indifferent to Nickelback. As long as The Jonas Brothers, Justin Timberlake, and anybody with the prefix "lil" in their name are allowed to "perform" I have bigger fish to fry than Nickelback.
-Talladega Nights, or maybe Walk Hard, Superbad was ok as well. None of them ever even came remotely close to living up to the hype.
-If somebody held a gun to my head and demanded something such as listening to one of those bands forever I would immediately know that he/she did not have the balls to shoot. Though I do not dislike Greenday, I would eventually and therefore I would take the chance and attempt to disarm said individual. At which point I would either become dead, or I would strip the broken individual down, baste the person in honey, and stake the individual to an ant hill... for funsies. Then I would place, out of reach, a prerecorded and looped compilation of every Barbara Streisand album ever recorded. This would result in a satisfying and fit retribution for such an individual.
-Great and terribly things I've done have always been based on the same thing, though none have been so great or so terrible. Funsies.
-I'll listen to npr from time to time. I like to get an hearty helping of of right wing propaganda from Fox News and then balance it out with an equal serving of bleeding heart whiney bullshit from NPR. This helps me to keep things in proper perspective.
-I don't hug strangers because they might have leprosy, necrotizing fasciitis, tuberculosis, the herp, or just a switch blade. It might even turn out that they are a republican. If this were the case they may attempt to violate me right there in the elevator. Later that day I will see my attacker on the news denouncing gay marriage. I prefer just to stare blankly right into their face. Maybe I'll ask if they also collect precious moments figurines.
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